breakfast in bed, waffles on a plank and a teapot, dressed with eucalyptus leaves
Illustration by Marta Pucci

Date Night Ideas at Home

Photo of Dr Katherine Hertlein
Reviewed by Dr Katherine Hertlein,
created by Blueheart
created by Josh Green
created by Sophie Browness
Date published:
3/24/2022
Last updated:
5/8/2022
Photo of Dr Katherine Hertlein
Reviewed by Dr Laura Vowels,
created by Blueheart
created by Josh Green
created by Sophie Browness
Date published:
3/24/2022
Last updated:
5/8/2022

TL;DR

  • When life stops you going out, why not organize a romantic date night at home?
  • For some people an at home date night can be more relaxing, less stressful and less costly that heading out. Which means it's easier to find time to make it happen.
  • You might fancy a special dinner, play favorite games or movies, share a bottle of wine, enjoy a spa night or try something new together. Whatever you choose to do, get creative and make sure you both make an effort. 
  • The most important thing is to focus on one another during your date night. Allow time for conversation and connection, put the phones away and escape to a world where only the two of you exist. 
  • Try not to add pressure around having or expecting sex as this could increase performance anxiety. There are ways you can introduce sexy activities to the evening if that's what you wish to do - you can then see where the mood takes you.

 

We’ve all been there, whether the kids are too tiring, work has been a nightmare or we’ve just gotten lazy due to pandemic, lockdown and whatever else. But there are times when a fun date night seems to become a distant pipe dream.

Just because you can’t get out, though, doesn’t mean you can’t still enjoy a special night. You just need to move the needle and do something different.

Go on, book that romantic night in the diary, even if you know you won’t be leaving the house. 

What are the benefits of a date night at home?

Firstly, don’t look at your date night at home as somehow second best – you need to go all in with enthusiasm. There really are plenty of benefits. And your evening can still be romantic and fun-filled… and even a little surprising. You just need to get creative.

There will be less rushing around, feeding the kids, getting them to bed, sorting your hair and make-up before the taxi arrives. Which makes it more relaxing, easier to find the time and most likely less budget-busting too.

Here are some great couples date night ideas to get you started.

Phones down and relax

It doesn’t always have to be something ‘cool’, Instagram-able or even particularly dramatic. Sometimes a home date night can simply be about spending quality time in one another’s company. Perhaps it’s a time to put the phones away and just be present. Ban the kid talk, the work talk, and the money talk and concentrate on connection, conversation and a phone-free dinner.

  • Try a favorite movie and takeaway – snuggle up together on the sofa and choose a film that you both know and enjoy. That way you won’t be concentrating too much on the screen and can chat with one another instead.
  • Play a classic board game or card game - try to keep the competitiveness out of it and just enjoy a bit of good-natured game-based banter over your favorite game.
  • Choose a game where you’ll need to work together – if you're a competitive couple, where one, or both of you, tend to get a little bit over the top, why not find a game that requires you to work together? Perhaps an at home escape room style game that will get you collaborating to solve puzzles, or even two-player adventure-based video games that allow you to work as a team. Failing that, a good old jigsaw puzzle might be the perfect idea to get you off the electronics, chatting and enjoying one another’s company.
  • Take time to reminisce – when was the last time you took out the wedding album and looked through it together? Or the holiday snaps from that once in a lifetime trip a few years ago? We don’t tend to print out our photos and put them into albums like we used to, but that doesn’t mean we can’t enjoy them and share them. It can be really healthy to look back, remember and appreciate our shared history.

Get active together

Want something that gets you up and active, rather than trying sedentary games and films? Fair enough – that still doesn’t mean you have to venture out. If you’re the kind of couple that prizes your Strava stats over all else, there’s no reason you can’t introduce some sweat into your evening’s proceedings.

  • Try an online class together in something you’ve never tried before – think Zumba, martial arts or acrobatics, you’re sure to find a YouTube video or free trial to get you started. Push the furniture back, create some space and see what happens. You might even find you fancy finishing it off with a shared shower or bubble bath.
  • Crank up the music and bring the disco home – if you can’t go out to the dance party, why not bring the dance party to you? Take it back to the decade you met, share your favorite tunes or search for the hottest new playlists on Spotify. Whatever music you choose, pump up the volume and get cutting some crazy shapes around the living room. Disco balls optional!
  • Take the level of activity down a notch with a shared yoga or Pilates class - if you’re struggling to find some down time in your busy schedules, this could be a great way to practice a bit of mindfulness. It’ll get you focused, relaxed and ready for the rest of the evening together.

Be creative

You don’t need to be an artist to benefit from a bit of creativity, but shared activities can be a great way to bring you together. You’ll gain a new experience, and you might even be surprised by your partner's talents.

  • Choose an activity that neither of you have tried and give it a go – it might be collage, watercolor painting or origami, for example. Whatever you choose, make sure the materials aren’t too costly and it’s easy to get started with the help of the internet or a book. Yes, you might feel a little odd getting started, but spending time together getting creative in this way can be really healthy and beneficial.
  • Share a talent you already have – does your partner play a musical instrument or did you excel in your ballet exams while you were a child? Either way, it’s time to dredge up those old abilities. You could teach one another or simply sit back and watch, listen and appreciate the hidden depths of your partner.
  • Start a new project together – having a shared goal can be a really powerful thing. You might decide to set up a model railway together or growing veg in planters and pots. Maybe you could create photo books from all the pictures you’ve stored on your phone over the years, or perhaps there's a DIY project you're both really excited by. Whatever you choose, it needs to be something for both of you, something that gets you excited for the possibilities and something that will get you thinking and sharing ideas at all times of the day and night. Get that Pinterest board set up and get going!

Make it sexy

If you want to use your at-home date night as a way to up the intimacy in your relationship, why not set the scene right from the beginning of the evening.

  • Try our sex questions to ask your partner – they range from completely tame ice breakers to more fruity options. Introduce some of them during a special dinner, or take a hot bath together and choose a few of your favorites to answer. You might even learn something you didn’t already know.
  • Ask your partner how they feel about porn – different people have very different opinions about the use of porn with or without a partner, so have a read of our tips for introducing the idea of porn and see whether it’s something you might like to suggest.
  • Treat yourself to some new sex toys – if you fancy a bit of fun, a date night at home could be a great time to invest in a new toy or two and get experimenting with them. Have a read of our guide to using sex toys alone and together for inspiration and plenty of ideas.

But don’t put yourself under too much pressure

If setting the evening up for sex feels like too much pressure, or if you’re not quite in that ‘place’ in your relationship at the moment, give yourselves a break, take the pressure off and take a look at our article offering ways to get closer to your partner beyond sex.

And why not take the opportunity to give the Blueheart app a go. A touch-based session could give you the chance to reconnect as you go through the exercises in the privacy of your own home. You’ll be able to progress as slowly as you wish, developing intimacy and trust in your relationship as you go along.

Remember, you don’t have to choose one activity from the list of romantic date night ideas above, you can mix and match to fill the time available. Light candles, open a bottle of wine and try to enjoy each other's company.

The most important thing is to have fun and remember, no matter what, you can do better than yet another evening with your feet up in front of Netflix!

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